3020 —שלום בית: אריכות התפלה של הבעל, והתבוננות בהשגחה פרטית לחיות בתפלה

B"H, 12 MarCheshvan, 5715.

Brooklyn.

Greetings and blessing!

In reply to your letter of 27 Tishrei, in which you write of the situation in the home of your sister and brother-in-law, may they live, which is not as it should be: of course, as you ask, I will write with a view to bringing their hearts closer, to your brother-in-law. But you on your part and the family in general must explain to your sister, may she live, that all the more so: when a husband is delayed at his business or in the office where he finds his source of livelihood, no one resents it; on the contrary, people are glad that there is a source of livelihood and that the husband works faithfully, so that his livelihood too will be "secure." Yet all this concerns only intermediaries, that is, the owner of the office or the position, which are the channels through which the Holy One, blessed be He, Who nourishes and sustains all, gives a man his livelihood and that of his household. If so, how many times greater must be the joy when the husband works faithfully for the principal and only Owner, for a man's livelihood is what he requests during prayer, which is the request for a person's needs, and the channels and vessels through which the Holy One, blessed be He, bestows livelihood are matters of Torah and mitzvos... And just as your sister does not resent her husband's being at his job or at his study for several hours on weekdays, how much less should one resent that on Shabbos, of which, in the language of the Zohar, "all the days are blessed from it," he prolongs his prayer and his being alone with G‑d, for as is brought in the sefarim, the prayer of Shabbos includes the prayers of all the weekdays, whose middle blessings are not only "You graciously grant man knowledge" but also "Hear our voice," etc...

What alarms me most is that you write that your sister is in her parents' home, for to our sorrow we have seen tangibly that when people interfere between a man and his wife, even those closest (and at times there is more concern for harm, G‑d forbid, than for repair, specifically from the close relatives, for being a party and related to one of the above there is room for more harm than from the interference of an outsider). To say more is superfluous, for I hope that these lines of mine, few in number, will bring about the repair of the situation as soon as possible, and that you will give me good news.

As to what you write about yourself, that although it is easy for you to have intent in saying Tehillim in Pesukei DeZimrah, etc., you do not feel vitality in the blessings of Shemoneh Esrei: you ought to go deeply into the teachings of the Baal Shem Tov, especially on Divine Providence and the bond and unity between every Jew and the Holy One, blessed be He, explained in several places in the teachings of Chassidus. By accustoming yourself to these ideas it will be engraved in your soul, not only in understanding but also in feeling, and in the words of the Alter Rebbe in the holy Tanya at the beginning of chapter 41: that the Infinite One, blessed be He, leaves the higher and lower beings and unites His kingship upon the people of Israel, and upon you in particular, etc., and behold, G‑d stands over you, etc., and guides you and bestows all your needs and those of your household. Then you will easily have intent in the middle blessings, and how much more so in the first three and the last three.

With blessing, awaiting good news.